Twilight

I'm sighing as I type this. Honestly.

My mother took my sister and I to see the Twilight movie yesterday. Now, I had read the book at the urging of family members and friends and at the curiosity of just what made it so special, and I wasn't left in awe. Don't get me wrong, it was a fun read. It was a nice change from what usually I am required to read for class or what I choose to read for myself. But it wasn't amazing. It was just. Okay.

So, I was looking forward to the movie with dread. Having been unable to watch a trailer without laughing my head off or rolling my eyes, I was a bit unsure of what to expect. What I did expect was a movie on terms with the book - sappy, without substance.

And I was right. The acting wasn't all that great, no good special effects, and quite honestly, whatever substance the book did have was taken right out.

Someone's probably angry at me right now, so I'll sigh again and do some explaining. When I say "substance" I mean "real, moving plot" or "interesting development" or "intriguing dialogue". Twilight had something that made me read to the end, but I am in no way motivated to pick it up again or probably even to continue.

Bella is a Mary-Sue. She's weak and whiny, but everyone loves her, especially this big, strong, powerful, highly-attractive man. And he loves her no matter what. It's somewhat irritating. And Edward is a bishounen (go wikipedia it or google it if you don't know what that means), and that's about all there is to him. I'm sorry. I really do kind of like Edward, but he's also a bit creepy. No matter how attractive they might be, I would not want my potential love interest sneaking into my room and watching me sleep, or following me everywhere.

What I look for in characters is someone that changes, someone that develops, someone that "grows up" in a substantial way in between the beginning and the end. I look for non-stereotypical, strong characters.

I look for engaging, meaningful dialogue that takes the story somewhere.

I look for a plot with action, with undertones, with meaning, with symbolism and metaphors and excitement. I look for a plot with depth, a plot that has you asking, "What's going to happen?" I look for a plot that always has you guessing. I look for a plot that makes a story that says something about life, or about humankind... a book that really, truly makes you think about the world.

I'm sorry to say that I thought Twilight fell a little short.

It might just be the literature lover in me that looks for more than a 2D story, but I find a story with no real depth to just be boring. I like stuff that makes me think, that makes me feel.

Perhaps it's just my own bad experiences with romance that make me shirk from romantic novels. But when it comes to movies, I am ridiculously easy to please. There have been few movies that I watched when afterwards, I thought to myself, "That really was not a good movie."

I'm sorry, really I am.

As a bonus, it doesn't help that someone on costumes crew in Twilight seems to have been watching Monochrome Factor.

Look for it during the class field trip, in the greenhouses.

/review. Begin running from upset Twilight fans.